December 31, 2009
Got the call ....
and this award ... the  Lord and friends have truly been a huge blessing to me this year. 

Michelle has been up with me in the middle of the night  -- chatting with me and helping me stay sane!!

I was truly trying to be patient about the test results, but the last two days have been stressful.   That's putting it mildly.  I try to stay strong for everyone else.  Jason at work probably sees me at my weakest most days ... I'm thankful he puts up with me.   I think we were both stressing about the call today!!

Thanks Jason!   I could never repay you for all your support and putting up with me.

And I'm losing my eyebrows again, how goofy is that?   Ugh.

MRI and PET Scan both do not show any signs of Metastasis

Thank you Lord!!!

and thank YOU for all your prayers!!



December 30, 2009
Wondering if I'll start glowing??
MRI on the brain done, and for those who wondered, Yes there IS a brain inside my skull.  

PET Scan done -- they inject radioactive glucose in your vein ... nice ... surely I will start to glow a bright green color here shortly.  Which proves sugar isn't any good for you. 

And now the wait begins ... hate waiting for news.   Even though I am hoping and believing for good things.  We've seen the hand of the Lord throughout this entire trial ...  my faith is weak.  It's been a rough road ... and I am praying this is the end of it.

I will see the doctor every 3 months, his request.  Scans every 6 months.  {sigh} But by the grace of God they will all be clear ... starting this morning ...

3 inches of snow hit us this morning ... it was an interesting drive to St. Luke's.   I need tires. Bad.  

I have to go pick out glasses and get Stephen his replacement lenses.   I have that crud that is going around -- went to bed about 630 last night ... thanks to my vitamin regiment, its not as bad as some of my friends.  Ugh. 

Our neighbor plowed the drive again ... what a blessing!  Time to get some cleaning done while I feel like it before we brave the elements~!    Thanks as always, for your prayers.

I used cereal boxes to pack some of the gifts, but then actually gave
Ca'pn Christmas Crunch cereal to Josh and Stephen...

Puppies hung out with dad during the opening of the gifts, Mini too!

Josh and Lexi got dad the Motorola Cliq -- for a combined birthday and Christmas gift, but to get the great price they ordered it online and it didn't make it for Christmas .. so Josh made a box!

My birthday cake ... dad said that was more fitting a saying after this year.

Puppy Lap -- they think this is the best spot ... in fact one is crying at my feet now to get up here!
This was when we had all 4 in the house

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December 29, 2009
Menu Plan Monday ... a litte late

I've decided that it doesn't matter how much life is crazy right now (or ever!), it's always better to have a plan.

I'm a little late but better late than never!   Then I can refer back to my blog for the recipes later if I decide to make the food again.

I seriously need another rice maker.  I had one but it bit the dust, I want to try this Rice Cooker Macaroni and Cheese Recipe.  Much better than from a box.

Monday -- Leftovers from Christmas (Ham, Sweet Potatoes, Sushi) Chicken Noodle Soup

Tuesday -- Lasagna Soup, Salad and Bread

Wednesday -- Chicken Nuggets and Macaroni and Cheese, Veggies/Salad

Thursday -- this is till up in the air ... may go to a friend's house. In that case, I'll be cooking some dishes and will post.  (Meatballs, Buffalo Chicken Dip, Cheesecake ... ??)

Friday -- New Year's Day -- Sarai is supposed to take me to Japanese for my birthday.  Yumo.

Saturday --  Turkey, Mashed Potatoes, Sweet Potatoes, Veggies, Homemade Cranberry Sauce

Sunday -- Turkey Leftovers 

Starting to get a little nervous about all this, not so much the testing but the results.  {sigh}  My co-worker this morning asked me how hard was it really on you to face all those appointments alone?  In a way it made me sad that I didn't have anyone to rely on fully to go with me. Roy would go with me for the most part, but work stands in the way.  No supervisor -- she's on vacation last week and this one.  He asked if I had a friend that I could confide in with everything, and I shrugged and said that I did not.   I have the Lord of course, and I imagine He gets tired of me too.   I don't really think I'm an unfriendly person -- I had close friends in Colorado that I did stuff with them all the time and they were at my house 3-4 times a week.  I don't know maybe the Lord decided I needed to just depend on Him during this trial.   I'm a little scared today but keep reminding and quoting scriptures and the promises of the Lord to myself.  IJN!

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December 28, 2009
Machine Broke!
Was on the highway headed to St. Luke's when they called and said the machine wasn't working.
(sigh)   Would have just as soon get it over with.   Please pray I can get this done by 12/31/2009 -- so I don't have any payments due for the procedures.  IJN!   (Also pray for clear scans!!)  Believing and trusting the Lord for that. 

MRI on the brain still a go for Wednesday morning.  Bright and early.

We had a ton of snow for Christmas... more to follow!   Working!


December 25, 2009
Merry Christmas!!
Today, I am also turning 44  years old ... thank you Lord for another year!!

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December 24, 2009
Mary Did You Know?

Absolutely love this song!!

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December 23, 2009
Doc Visit Update
Radiation went well -- it usually does.  They gave me a graduation certificate and a prayer shawl for healing.  I'll scan a photo in later this evening.

Got my prosthesis and two bras!!  Awesome.  Those things are heavy and they are the ultra light?  Woah.

Then went to see Dr. Shwaiki.  He's still as quirky as ever.  The short of it, is I do a full Pet Scan on Monday morning at 0730 sharp and a brain MRI on Wednesday morning.  This isn't a precautionary thing, he wants to make sure it didn't spread.   For a lot of reasons, which I'll write about later.   I've not had a pet scan before -- more information can be found here.  Pray its clear!

I'm handling things okay -- believing and trusting God.  IJN!

Extra prayers can't hurt.


December 23rd
OK -- taking deep breaths here ... that kick in the gut feeling is back.  Hate it.

Off to last Radiation Treatment at 1100 -- I will be in treatment at 1145.  

Then off to see Dr. Shwaiki -- I know he won't check/do scans and such.  But just the thought of going and not knowing ... its scary.  

Another appointment alone.   That has been one of the worst parts of this journey.  

Then I go and get fitted for the prosthesis ... the insurance will cover that in full.  (before Dec 31st!)

Have to get onions ... to make spaghetti sauce.     Come home and clean up a bit -- dusting and such.  I will wash all the floors tomorrow morning.  Its been raining so keeping them clean should be a joy.  Dogs and rain and mud don't go together well.

We have church service tonight.  I will make a last run to the stores tomorrow morning... after checking my lists and checking them twice ...

Pray for me ... my heart is heavy today.   My spirit is disturbed.   {sigh}

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Joy to the World
Merry Christmas!   May you & your family be blessed.

Thank you for ALL your prayers this past year. 

Don't stop praying either!!     Love, Me

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December 22, 2009
Make Ahead Meals for Busy Moms

I stumbled across this website/book tonight ... her recipes are pretty healthy -- and she has some great ideas.  I am going to see if I can find this book at the library to try it out first.

Looks promising!  Here's a link to her blog with some recipes on it and a book review with her spaghetti sauce recipe included.  Her blog's pretty awesome too.

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December 21, 2009
My Radiation Oncologist
is definitely one awesome lady.   I've been blessed to be under her care.  Not only her medical care, but her care for me as a patient.  She said I did awesome, and wants me to be their poster child!  LOL!   I told her I need hair first. 

I have 2 more treatments ... then go see her in about a month to see how everything is healing.

She told me to tell Dr Shwaiki thank you for sending me to her, she is just so nice.  I got 2 hugs from her today.  I told her she was awesome -- she loves what she does and it shows. 

She was named one of Kansas City's top doctors in 2006.  These I guess are voted on by other health professionals, which I think tells you a lot.  You can read the article here.

#31 ...
It's a little scary to be at this point. No treatments after Wednesday. I am the type of person who HAS to do something.

Truly I have to leave my life in the Lord's hands, not keep putting it there and taking it back. Again and again.

Ya know, there is no cure for cancer.

That's a sobering thought.

I never thought that I would be at this place in life.

I wondered yesterday if that lump they found in 2003 was actually cancer and God healed it.

In that case, this is my reoccurrence. Scary thought. But if God can heal me once, He can heal me a thousand times.

I probably shouldn't have scheduled my appointment with Dr. Shwaiki this week, I already have too much on my mind and heart. I kind of chuckle at people for getting so dramatic over their simple trials. I kind of wonder what they'd do if they actually had a horrific trial. But I guess to them its horrific. There are definitely worse trials than this cancer was. Most definitely.  Josh seems to be going through it ... I think we all get fought as we walk with the Lord.  Guess that means we are doing something right, huh? The enemy has no need to fight with someone who isn't right.

I turn 44 on Friday ... and am thankful for those 44 years. The Lord truly has been good to me. My mom had me when she was 44 ... so this year a lot of dates and numbers go together. I had my surgery on September 23rd, which is when my husband was filled with the Holy Ghost. My last chemo treatment was August 12th, my mom's birthday.

See Dr. Lindstrom today and RT # 31 .... going to try and finish some last minute stuff and make some cookie trays for co-workers, hub's, Lexi and Josh's work ... we'll see.

Appreciate, as always your prayers as I journey into life without seeing doctors every day ...

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December 18, 2009
On the Home Stretch ...

Feeling a little melancholy ... 4 more treatments and I am finished.

A little scared now.   Ok, A LOT scared now.

My life and health have always truly been in the hands of the Lord.  

It's so much more so during this season of life.  Well more of a daily thought, because our lives are in His hands.

To God be the glory ...  thank you Lord for carrying me and walking with me during this past year.  Thank you for strength and the desire to take one more step when I didn't feel I could go on.

You are an amazing Savior and I love you with all my heart.

Thank you for choosing me to serve you.   


December 17, 2009
Christmas is Coming! (Thankful Thursday)

Still have a few things on my list ... not much.  

Stephen was sick during the night last night.  I heard him calling me about 0150.  He wanted his dad to come upstairs and pray for him.  He is having those stomach pains, chills, fever, sweating again.  Ugh.  He always has a lot of "gas" and belches alot but they checked that one stomach problem and it came back negative.  Hub is taking him to the doctor today, please keep him in prayer.   We want to find out what the problem is and get it cleared up.   He has 3 finals today and is plugging through them.   My co-worker's wife is at the hospital right now, please pray for her as well. 

RT # 29 is today ... 5 left.  These last 5 target the scar only with a different type of radiation.  I finish on Dec 23rd.   I'm so glad.  I'm tired of the daily treks.   Today under my arm is a little sore -- like its burnt.  But thankfully the Lord put the effects to a minimum.

Tomorrow is our Annual Christmas Dinner with the church family.  Work here has one too, but I'll probably skip it depending on how Stephen is.   I can only do so much and keep sane.  =)

I plan on making easy stuff, Tator Tot Casserole (figuring the kids would like it); Sugar Cookie Bars and my recipe for Banana Pudding.   That was requested.  Actually they requested I make 3 batches. 

Going to have a cookie/sweet making party on Saturday with Lexi and Sarai.    A few errands in the morning and the rest of the day spent doing Christmas stuff.

Our Christmas menu is:   Baked Ham, Twice Baked Potatoes, Sweet Potatoes, Homemade Rolls, Veggies, Nana's Apple Salad and dessert.  We'll probably do an antipasto tray, since we usually do that.

Treats:   Chocolate Covered Pretzels, Chocolate Covered Marshmallow Pops, Peppermint Bark, Cut Out Cookies, Chocolate Covered Cherry Cookies; Chocolate Chip Cookies Chocolate Crinkles  (Alot of this will be given away too!) Homemade Snicker Bar Candy

Thankful Thursday List
  • Thankful for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for His saving grace and healing power.
  • I am thankful for my healing.
  • Thankful for my dear husband. 
  • Thankful for my kiddos.   They make life interesting.
  • Thankful for our Pastor and his wife.
  • Thankful for our church family
  • Thankful for another day!
  • Thankful for almost being done with RT!!   Yeah.
  • Thankful the Lord directed us to great doctors.  While He is the Great Physician -- and all glory goes to Him, we are still thankful for compassionate doctors and nurses.
  • Thankful for employment during these times and being able to keep up with bills.  (Even with all these extra medical and fuel costs!)
  • Thankful we did find a good home for Koko -- not the one I'd hoped but I believe a good one.
  • Thankful for good insurance!!


December 16, 2009
My Co-Workers

I work events that the college hosts for the international officers.  There was a Holiday Dinner Dance that last two Fridays.  (One for each class!)   I usually stay 3 hours and roll home.  Here is a photo that Jason's wife took last Friday.   I skipped the scarf in favor of a crocheted beanie type hat for this night.  Still needing lots of hair to go without.

The Nutcracker was super!   I wish I knew more of the story before we arrived.  Beautiful dancers.
It was a pretty packed auditorium.   Stayed out way past my bedtime.

The hub gets to work every day the next two weeks so his supervisor can take vacation.  Joy. 

I have 6 more treatments .... going to be a busy couple of weeks. 


December 15, 2009
Mondays are always wonderful!   I type that in jest ... I did accomplish a lot yesterday which was a relief off my shoulders. 

Nice visit with the Radiation Oncologist - Dr. Lindstrom.  She's awesome.  She asked me if I wanted a month off, or even two weeks to give myself a break.  It would be nice, that there are two main issues with that.  The leave issue and I wouldn't do that to my co-worker with a new class coming on Jan 2nd.  He's been here for me this year, taking up a lot of my slack.  No way.  She understood that.  Honestly, I could probably use it.   You can only go on light speed for some long.

The area looks amazingly.  The Lord has kept the damage/skin irritation to a bare minimum.  I saw another lady's that was there by her neck ... it wasn't pretty.  Plus she was talking about helping with the bandages to her husband.   Doc even gave me a hug at the end.  Super nice lady.  They've all been great to me.

I see Dr. Shwaiki on the 23rd of December.  My Radiation graduation date!  IJN only good news.

We lost one of the goats yesterday ... (sigh) ... it was the colored female.  Females are worth more to us than the males.  Not sure if it was just the cold.  She didn't act sick before -- how sad.   Hub put up tarps to close them in from the wind.  We have heaters, but we are afraid of fire out there.

We found a new home for the puppy we called Koko.  He now has a new name of Spike.  He has a home with a mom, dad and 2 little boys.   Glad for that.  Here's a photo of him, isn't he cute?

The puppies do NOT like the cold.   I bundle up and take them out and stay out there with them or else they are crying at the door before doing their business.

We went to see the Christmas Pageant at Raytown Baptist Church on Saturday.  
One word: AWESOME.  If there were any more performances, I'd go again.  Amazing.  Definitely on the list for 2010.

Tonight is: The Nutcracker!!  Going with Sis H and Sarai will be there with a couple of her friends.  Lexi works it.  So the ladies are going.   Can't wait!!

Busy week -- no menu plan on paper, but I do have one in my head.  Thursday night will be spent cooking for the Annual Christmas Dinner/Potluck on Friday evening. Doing easy stuff, but it will be plentiful  I could never just bring cokes or sliced bread!   LOL!   I enjoy making it (most of the time)
Saturday morning will be last minute stuff -- and then cooking baking at the house the rest of the evening.

I remember this morning, I need to pick up something for Judy and the bus-driver and a teacher that Stephen adores.  =)   Any suggestions???  The teacher is an art teacher.   I wish I remembered when I was in KC on Saturday.  

Stephen just texted -- he got a perfect score on his Algebra final.  He is doing amazing with his grades this semester.  

Better get to work -- lots to catch up on.  RT today -- #27!!!

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December 14, 2009

It is amazing to me how much the Lord has given me strength this past year when I felt like giving up!


December 10, 2009
The Voice of Truth ....

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December 5, 2009
Special Prayer Request
A family in our church lost their brother in a horrible accident.  He was only 19 years old, all his siblings are  younger than he.  They are truly inconsolable.  Please, please pray for this family.   I can't imagine, and don't want to.   My heart hurts for them, we've known the younger children since they were babies.  How can I help them??   Besides praying without ceasing...


December 4, 2009
19 out of 33
Just checking in -- been busy at work and it's wearing me out.  So, aside from things I have to get done, everything else is on the "hold" pile. 

Done with 19 treatments, number 20 today.  13 to go which actually equals 2 1/2 weeks more.  I will be done on the 23rd of December.  Right before Christmas/Birthday.  That's a good present.  I have to see my onocologist this month -- so praying for a clean bill of health.  No, thanking God for one.  Amen.

Puppies are growing ... one more needs a home.  A forever home.  He's a good one too!  He has a great personality.  Cute markings too.  We just can't keep all of them.

I think I need a few days off -- I'm beyond tired and I am so stressed at work -- it isn't good for anyone.
But graduation is next week and then the new class arrives.   {sigh}

Will try to check in this weekend.  Thanks for the continued prayers!!  

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