Happy Thanksgiving!!

There truly is much to be thankful for.  I need to have a thankful attitude every day ... not just on Thanksgiving.  And I really do ... I am thankful for the Lord Jesus Christ, His healing power and saving grace.  Ya know, He chooses us, we do not choose Him.  I thank Him for showing us the truth.  There is not 50 forms of salvation, there is only ONE.  One Lord, One Faith, One Baptism.  Can't get any simpler than that.

He sacrificed for us, how come we can't sacrifice some wordly things for Him? 
I am thank for one more day, my husband and kids.  They've growing up and are now teaching me things.

They have no doubt that God is going to take care of this cancer and I am to be completely healed.  I pray so.  It's always been in His hands ... and it will continue to be.   I just need to leave it there.

I am thankful for all our material blessings ... for there are many.   Much more than we need. 

Thankful for pets ... and friends ... Taco, Mini, Chipper, Cloudy and Sammy .... all the little pups.  They ease your heart a bit, but don't take it all away.  They are showing their own minds now.   I have 2 on my lap ... sitting here and they jump up and whine and bite your leg till you pick them up. 

Thankful for a wonderful Pastor and wife ... a great church .... church family.

Good jobs when some have none.  

Good health ... really ... there are those in much worse shape than I. 

Daniel ... for loving my son.  Josh for loving him back. 

Caleb for knowing when you are down ...kids are amazing that way.   Jazz is just like that.

Off to bake that Cream Cheese Pound Cake .... thankful for my stove and thankful Sarai has a dishwasher!!

Happy Thanksgiving ... wishing you all a wonderful day!!

Clarification ...

In no way shape or form do I compare the loss of a dog to the loss of a child -- but I do think telling someone what I stated in my previous post are among the top dumbest things you can tell someone. 

Just want to clarify that -- its been a beyond stinky week for whatever reason.  Life is just overwhelming in the Crook household, and rather than burden my hub or children, I vent here.   I know the Lord will fight these battles, but if you know Michelle, you know how impatient I am.  =)  Add that to everything else ... to an unseemingly unending trial ... a mind that never shuts off .... and yeah welcome to my world. 

And Lord, I am waiting to see how you fight this one ... my son gave me insight last night.  I think he's got the right idea, I just need to get his attitude ...

What Faith Can Do ...

Needed to hear this song today.  Thanks Michelle -- love you girl!! 
Still confounds me about "well meaning" people and those who will do anything to get some glory. 
Go Away Boo!!!!   (I am trying to have a better attitude, believe it or not!!  I let out steam here so I don't tell those people to their face how much of an idiot  dolt I think they are!! -- I am really trying ... honest)  And I'm praying for a better attitude!

Warning ...

this will not be an uplifting post but rather a way to express my frustrations!

I'm not sure if people are just stupid or they just don't think.  Or both.  Grrrr.

Ya know -- you don't just "get" another dog, sure you "get one", (maybe) but its not like its a fix to your grief and it solves everything.  I'm sure there are dogs out there to love and they need a person to care for them.  Ok, I KNOW that.  But HELLO -- you don't just replace a friend.  That's almost up there with, don't worry you can get another child or you can get another husband.  I mean after all, you are able to have more children, so what's the problem?   Stupid.  Ok --   they think they are helping.  But, ya know I don't need that kind of help.

I could go on and say, oh you're trying to help now?  Where were you the last 7 months?  Gee, thanks for all your support.   Don't get me wrong, I didn't expect anything from anyone after the first few weeks.  I realized that "expecting" was definitely wrong.  It definitely gave me a new sense of worth (or unworth) to people and that everyone lives on their own island and wants you to help them, but to help someone else?  Yeah.  Not. 

It's not been a good week.  I'm not sure if its because my stress level is 852, when it should be 10.  People thinking I am actually stupid to see behind what is really said.  I'm not dumb, okay.  And I'm definitely NOT an idiot.   Where did they get that idea from if they didn't get it from you?  Why lie?  Because make no mistakes it is a lie.

At work we have students who are flat out lying to you and they expect you to believe it!!

I love the "Well, I'm going to die from something?"  Yeah,  here let's switch our healths.  {eyeroll}

And the ones who are super paranoid about having an ingrown toe nail.  Get a grip, ok.  God is much bigger than that.  Trying living with the thought, that if this cancer comes back -- you're dead.  How's that in a nutshell?

And yes, I've already complained to the Lord.  Cried with frustration about my lot in life. I'm sure He's sick of hearing that one.  

But -- do me a favor, don't add to it.  Don't peg me for an idiot while you are at it.  I'd rather you  just left me alone.  I'll pray for you, should you come to mind.  Make no mistakes.  I HAVE to be ready.  Knowing what I know, I have to be.  And Heaven ain't worth people acting like idiots foolish.

Thanksgiving Week Menu and Links

2 Pumpkin Rolls for hub's work on Tuesday morning

I  will make a lighter version of Pumpkin Rolls for ours.  (using egg beaters and light cream cheese)

Pumpkin Pie  (Josh's favorite)

Pecan Pie for hub

Pumpkin Rolls  these are dinner rolls -- not dessert rolls.

Homemade Cranberry Sauce

Green Bean Casserole   ( I don't like this but it was requested!) 

Image Courtesy Link

Antipasto Platter -- my family tradition served at every holiday involving Italians!

Image Courtesy Link

Nana's Apple Salad -- I put marshmallows in too.  Hub's family tradition.

We'll make some type of fruit pie, Stephen is NOT a pie fan at all.  May make a Cream Cheese Pound Cake for him, and probably some cookies for them to snack on.

Menu Plan Monday -- Thanksgiving Week

Decided that I need to get back to my schedules -- makes life easier for me.  To be honest, I have not been feeling the greatest at all.  {sigh}  Which makes my mind go nutso with thoughts.  Not a good combination at all.  I need sleep/rest. 

Sunday -- Hamburger Patty Special, Small Pasta, Spinach, Corn, Pineapple

Monday -- Chicken Quesadillas with Salad, Pineapple

Tuesday -- Clean out the fridge or Pigs in a Blanket

Wednesday -- Lipton Noodle Soup, Pigs in Blanket or Toasted Ham and Cheese Sandwich, Peaches

Thursday -- Happy Thanksgiving !!  (menu to follow with links)

Friday -- Black Friday --- probably whatever we can grab out. 

Pup Photos

Trixi looks just like Taco.  And yes, I am still missing him.  There's still a void in life without him.

 Rocko, Trixi and Cocoa.  Shadow wanted nothing to do with the camera.

It's a little sad to see some of Taco's personality come out in them ... but bittersweet really is the right word.

I'm thankful for the time we had with Taco and thankful for his babies when at first we were not happy at all that Mini was having pups.  

Trying ...

Today .. the year 2009? ... has been particularly trying to say the least.

I am beyond tired ... been doing lots of thinking -- mind battles mostly, thinking of just giving up.  Tired.

Weary of the battles ... they seem constant.

Work was horrid -- we've been gone for 3 days and they decide we need to have a 90 minute at 0830.
{eyeroll}  Then they tell us we will have to compete for our job ... nice.  I gave up a promotion last year because this job was said to be getting one.   I do know it was the right decision -- because I know I would not have gotten the support at the other job with the whole cancer thing.

At church last night -- God moved in a mighty way.  Another sister in our church has cervical cancer.  Cancer sucks.  It robs you and steals things from you.  She was getting prayed for and I could feel it all the way over where I was.  Woah.   I went to pray with her -- and  you know what went through my mind?  Because I could feel her pain, I knew her struggles, I knew her fears, I knew the overwhelming crushing blows she felt ... because I had felt the same things.  I thanked God for that.  Without the cancer, I wouldn't have been able to relate in such an intimate way.  God is going to do amazing things through this ... if I could just get through it all ... but I will.  I'm tough.  The Lord made me tough.

My co-worker will be leaving as soon as the door opens ... I want to pray that God will not allow it to open, but it pains me to see him so unhappy.  He deserves better.  {sigh}

Who knows, I may not even qualify for my own job??  LOL   Now that would be a hoot!