November 6, 2009
RIP - Taco
He's sleeping on my lap here ... probably around Christmas time.  I was reading and we all fell asleep.  This picture makes me sad, because I much rather remember him being awake, but this is what he did, hung around us closely.

We buried Taco's body last night -- we didn't really bury "Taco" because his spirit will remain alive in our hearts and minds for all eternity, if the Lord allows. Hard, hard, hard. 

Hub built a box to lay his body in -- (yes, I am crazy and everyone wanted him buried more than just throwing him in the ground, well all except hub at the beginning!!)  He deserved that. 

When I found him, I ran in to get a blanket and the first one there was one that I was given after my surgery.  (Sorry Becky!)  It has the words "Covered in God's Grace" embroidered on it.   I think its fitting.  I feel better knowing that his body is nestled in God's care.  Grace is definitely what is going to see us through this.  Anyways, hub said he covered him nicely (I didn't look, I guess after I freaked out on him Monday, he thought it best to make sure Taco was taken care of right!)  Its funny, he made sure to tell me that before I even asked.  He did keep him in a plastic bag, and he said, yes, he needed to be in that too, but I made sure he was covered good.   Yeah, didn't want his wife freaking out on him again. 

We all helped dig the hole.  Stephen was hurting.  Even Lexi said  "Move Josh, I want to help."  Taco was loved.  And we were definitely loved in return, that's probably why it hurts so bad.   Maybe also is because we've never had inside dogs, until Mini and Taco.  They are family.  And I can tell you everything I did during the day and how Taco was a part of it.  That's just the way he was, I'd like to get another dog with his type of companionship, but I'm afraid.  I don't want to hurt this bad again.  Ugh.   I just want to know why.  I'll ask the Lord someday, and hopefully we'll see him again.  I asked hub if there were dogs in heaven, and he didn't see how there wouldn't be animals there... Yes!!!  (Yes, don't go crazy on me, I know they don't  have souls ... souls and their white or blackness put you in heaven or hell... I know that, ok?)

I have been looking for his squeaky toy and when we were all standing around the hole, Lexi said Josh has his squeaky by his bed!   Yeah, Taco was loved.   I think he knew it too.  The reason why is Lexi said Taco is having a blast playing with all those squeakies in heaven!  =)   I have a video of him and dad playing, a little blurry, but if I can figure out how to post it I will.  You'll see his personality SHINE!!

Same day ... him and Mini.  My buds.

Loved how pretty he was ... yes, he had googly eyes and a wandering one but a heart of gold!!

So much thought was taken in figuring out where to lay his body to rest, because if we ever moved, we didn't want anyone disturbing him.  Yes, we are crazy.  Stephen and I decided on in between the trees next to the driveway up to the barn.  We figured no one would need to do anything there.  In the spring we will get one of those good stone benches to put there and get his name engraved in it.  I couldn't see him being buried far away, he needed to be close to everything, since that is what he did during his short life.

Hub told me this morning, ya know you are going about it wrong.  You need to thank God for giving him to you when you needed him most.  I told him OH I DO, been thanking God for him alot.  Hoping and praying I never have to deal with cancer or its treatments again.  But being ill and having him made it easier.  He was a huge comfort to me.  You can not imagine ... and if you can, you can totally feel our (my) pain.

He was a very good friend to me. I just wish he didn't have to go so soon ... it wasn't long enough



No it never is long enough but I am going to look at it another way. Perhaps God put Taco into your life when most you needed it with the cancer. And maybe taco's job was over because the cancer is in the past. So therefore, it was time for taco to go and wait for you in Heaven. That's my story and I am sticking to it! Just glad I can view your blog and post on it again! love and huggles sweetie

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